Circle of Life



February 23 is the day my mother passed from this life. It was and wasn’t unexpected, we knew were were losing her we just didn’t know she would go so suddenly. The time between her death and and coming home had some mind blowing moments.

My mother wasn’t a very good mother. She did the best she knew how but she made many mistakes with us, I have two half sisters and a half brother by my mother. She sent my sisters and brother back to live with their father when I was two so I don’t have any memories of them. She redeemed herself as a grandmother, she was an amazing one and not one of her grandchildren were left without a deep love for her and knowing how much she loved them.

On February 29th I had a bitter sweet birthday, yep I’m a leap year baby and it was my 9th birthday, it was the first birthday that I remember having all my siblings with me and it was the first birthday without my mother. What a roller coaster of a day!


March 1st is when we laid mom to rest. For me it was a relief, I was finally out of limbo and I felt I could start healing and moving on. A few people showed up and it was nice to visit with everyone and swap stories. No one mentioning the many, many years of drinking that ultimately caused her death. Although we had eight more years with her after she quit the damage was done.

March 2nd I come full circle. In the morning I went to my parents home and picked up the belongings that were deemed mine. I said my good byes to my family and headed back to the farm. Did I mention I was staying on my in-laws farm? It was the perfect place for me during this time.


I stopped to check on an ewe that was in labor and after watching her for several minutes I decided she might be in trouble so I went to get my father and brother in law. After a call to a friend it was determined that we would have to pull the lambs. The poor beastie had twins tangled. Long story short I helped in the delivery the two little lambs.


What a wonderful way to end such a sad trip by bringing life into the world. What a powerful reminder that life goes on.